A man is arrested at a newspaper office for assault and battery when he attacks a reporter for writing and publishing his obituary before he actually dies. A thief is brought in for stealing surplus chicken parts from a government warehouse. The detectives surprise birthday party for Barney doesn't go as planned.

Harris and Wojo bring in an actor, arrested for assaulting his agent. A good samaritan is arrested after a choking victim he helped presses charges for assault. Dietrich spends the afternoon with an old flame.