Doty, take this down. I, Taryon Darrington, inventor and bestselling author, have met the most bewildering group of mercenaries in Exandria. A tall brooding one, a short angry one, and far too many pointy ears. They seem… promising? 

Doty, take this down. We've gathered in a mountain village for a ceremony. The food is mediocre and my fellow adventurers haven't spoken in a year. Uninvited guests crash the party. Rude. Doty, note that I handled it with grace.