Peter gets a check in the mail from the sale of his mother's home and he remembers that all of his old porn is still in there. When he returns to retrieve his stash, he finds a "to Peter from Peter" tape and realizes that his life has amounted to nothing. Reeling from his own failures, Peter then attempts to fix Chris before it's too late, and forces his son to spend time with Brian.

Quagmire admits that he is in love with Lois. Unfortunately, he proclaims his love while he has accidentally pocket-dialed Peter. Peter is furious and Brian takes it upon himself to fix the situation.