When the family has a garage sale, Brian accidentally sells Stewie's beloved teddy bear Rupert. Stewie is so distraught that Brian takes him on a cross-country road trip to Aspen, CO. When they find the culprit, Stanford, Stewie challenges him to a ski-off to get Rupert back. Meanwhile, Peter loses his license, so Meg has to drive him around.

When a bully begins to harass Chris, Peter goes to his defense, but the kid is so annoying that Peter beats him up. This is so satisfying that Peter realizes bullying is fun and begins to bully everyone in the house. Finally, Chris stands up to Peter and beats him senseless. Meanwhile, Stewie goes out without sunscreen and becomes obsessed with getting a tan. After Brian accidentally leaves him in the tanning booth for six hours, Stewie gets sunburned and fears he has cancer. While waiting for the results of his cancer screening, Stewie begins to live his life as if he had only days to live and drives Brian crazy with his demands.