It's marathon time and the city's gone into a frenzy of fundraising. So when Grumio's mistaken as a charity case, Marcus spies a money-making opportunity. Jason bets Aurelius he can beat him in the big race despite not having run since junior school.

It's the Roman festival of love so when Marcus is asked out by Gloria from next door, he can't tell if it's a date or a meeting about their party wall. Jason tries to maintain his Lupercalia perfect-score, while Grumio enjoys a romantic meal for one.