As the new Leader of Her Majesty's Opposition, former DOSAC Secretary Nicola Murray wants to concentrate on practising walking for laying the poppy reef at the Cenotaph. Unfortunately, what with being accosted by an 8 foot pork chop and her new aide, Helen, being photographed with embarrassing discussion notes, this is proving difficult.

Malcolm sees an opportunity to continue his plan to replace Nicola with Dan Miller as Leader when she is stuck on a train to Bradford. Unfortunately he is missing accomplices as Olly's burst appendix has him in hospital and Ben