When Matt is in a hurry to get to the fertility clinic, each member of the family has a crisis that prevents him from getting there on time.

When Greg and Jen's crazy neighbors invite them to a party, Greg makes up a lie so they can get out of attending. Also, Matt and Colleen discover they need to give up some necessities to increase their chances of having a child; a delivery mix-up results in John and Joan accidentally receiving the fancy Japanese toilet Tim ordered for himself; and Sophia decides to shave her legs.