It's Valentine's Day and Paddy's is packed with customers. Dennis implores the gang to do one day of actual work but everyone else is distracted by a mystery crate Cricket spotted in the alley. Eventually, the gang becomes convinced Dennis really wants them to work on their relationships and everyone shares their grievances without much resolution.

Dennis reveals he has a baby from his Wade Boggs layover in North Dakota. Everyone offers a solution for how to get him out of this jam. Mac suggests they pretend to be a couple and Frank wants to make the broad a "decent" proposal b/c $1 million for sex is indecent. In the end, Dennis has to decide which life he wants to continue to lead.