Includes a man with bizarre ballooning lips; a frustrated farmer with an obliterated knee, courtesy of a runaway sheep; and a mechanic who has carved up his finger in a car fan belt.

Plus, the stomach-churning story of a DIY enthusiast who nearly died after excavating his intestines with an angle grinder.

Features a teenager who superglued her fingers together while applying false nails, a granny who mangled her ankle after moshing in church, and a DIY enthusiast whose attempt at woodwork turned into the East Anglian Chainsaw Massacre.

Plus the schoolboy skewered like a human kebab - on a flagpole.