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Seaman Tubby Mason was ordered to go on a crash diet or be kicked out of the Navy, but O'Toole finds that Tubby's letters contain luncheon meat - and his toothpaste tube is filled with liverwurst.
Commander Stoner is bemoaning the loss of his youth, so O'Toole invites some of the commander's old classmates for a visit - hoping they look more "decrepit" than Stoner.
During maneuvers, the USS Appleby is to be the target of mock sabotage by a crew member secretly assigned to "blow up" the ship. Comander Stoner brags that the plot will never succeed - and backs up his boast with a large bet.