The boys begin an archaeological dig in their bar after Grumio unearths an old brooch whilst sitting on the loo. They try to keep their activity a secret but others cotton on. And when a professor of archaeology goes missing, the boys, who paid him a recent visit, are brought in for questioning.

Jason's brother Darius is getting married and Marcus desperately wants to hire out the Crown and Toga for the occasion, while Grumio offers his services as wedding planner. But their plans are threatened when they find out that Darius is a serial jilter. Elsewhere, Marcus clashes with their lazy postman.