The girls' neighbor, Renee Corliss, is feeling depressed about all of her children having moved out of the house and her doctor husband George's workaholic tendencies in this backdoor pilot for what would become the sitcom Empty Nest.

The girls reminisce about past birthday experiences while preparing a birthday party for a friend.

A pair of undercover cops show up to inform the girls that their new neighbors are dealers in stolen gems, and they must set up a stakeout at the girls' house to catch them in the act. During their stay, Dorothy ends up falling for one of the cops.

Dorothy's daughter Kate returns with a special announcement, and Dorothy hopes Kate's having a baby -- but it turns out she's splitting from Dennis after she found him cheating on her. Meanwhile, Blanche and Rose watch an all-night I Love Lucy marathon.

The girls plan a charity banquet for the hospital, and Blanche soon falls for the caterer, Jake. She backtracks, however, when she sees how "uncivilized" his manners and demeanor are compared to hers.

Dorothy is impressed with a paper written by Mario, a student of hers, and decides to enter it into a contest. Unfortunately, this ends up alerting the INS to Mario's status as an illegal alien, and he now faces deportation. Meanwhile, Rose loses Blanche's earrings, and must act as her personal servant as punishment.

Blanche attends her sorority reunion and is depressed when she sees her classmates have all had facelifts, so she decides to get one herself. Meanwhile, Rose films a video of the girls for a class at the junior college.

Sophia's sister Angela returns for an extended visit, and is soon talked into moving to Miami. Dorothy insists that Angela stay with the girls while she looks for an apartment, which irks Sophia to no end, as she believes that Angela is after everything she has. Meanwhile, Rose looks after a piano-playing chicken.

After some gentle prodding by Blanche and Rose, Dorothy invites a fellow teacher of hers over for dinner. Once he gets there, however, the girls learn one thing about him that Dorothy failed to notice -- he's a priest.

After the girls learn more than one of their relatives will be coming to visit, they decide to figure out the sleeping arrangements. As they do, they reminisce about the strangest sleeping situations they've ever had.

Sophia decides to enter herself into a charity walkathon, while Rose signs up herself, Dorothy and Blanche to babysit the children of the other participants. Once the walkathon is over, all of the kids are picked up -- except for one baby girl, who the girls fear has been abandoned.

After having a throat spasm, Rose is convinced that she had an out of body experience. As a result, she decides to live life to the fullest -- which also gets in the way of Blanche and Dorothy's lives, but when they confront Rose about it, Rose decides to move out.

A well-known actor comes to Miami to star in a local play with Dorothy, Blanche and Rose, and soon begins seeing each one behind the others' backs. Meanwhile, Sophia gets a job at a pirate-themed fast food restaurant.

As Dorothy gets ready to go on a double date with Blanche and a pair of twins, her ex-husband Stan arrives with the less than happy news that he has to have major surgery – and is looking for friends to take care of him during his recovery period.

Dorothy's surprise birthday party for Sophia blows up in her face when her birthday present – a special visit by Sophia's sister Angela – reveals past tensions between the sisters.

While attempting to fly to their respective families for Christmas, the girls' plans hit a snag when a depressed man in a Santa suit takes them hostage at the grief counseling center where Rose works.

A dateless Rose puts an ad in the personals column, then feels even more dateless when she doesn't get a response at first. Soon, though, she begins receiving letters from someone named "Isaac Newton" -- but Blanche confesses to Dorothy that she's the one who's writing the letters. Meanwhile, a 90-year-old British man takes an interest in Sophia.

When Dorothy looks for extra work to do during the summer, Blanche gets her a job at the museum where Blanche works. However, Blanche soon becomes jealous when it seems Dorothy is more proficient at her job than she is. Meanwhile, Rose finds a stray dog while shopping.

Dorothy, Rose and Blanche head for their dream vacation in the Caribbean -- but soon discover their "island paradise" is nothing like what was in the brochure. Meanwhile, Sophia romances the girls' Japanese gardener while they're away.

Dorothy's son Michael and Rose's daughter Bridget both arrive at the same time for a visit. The two initially are hostile to each other, but they end up clicking to such an extent they're soon discovered in bed together. Meanwhile, Blanche throws her back out in aerobics class.

Curtis "Big Daddy" Hollingsworth returns for another visit, with more news: he's engaged. Blanche couldn't be happier for her father until she meets his fiancée, who is half his age and even younger than Blanche. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Rose enter a songwriting contest.

Dorothy's friend Jean visits after her lover dies, and begins spending a fair amount of time with Rose. Unbeknownst to the others, however, Jean is a lesbian, and soon starts developing feelings for Rose. Meanwhile, Sophia rents "dirty movies" to watch on the girls' new VCR.

The girls create a petition to save a 200-year-old oak tree, though one notable name is not on the list -- Frieda Claxton, the curmudgeonly neighbor of theirs whose property the tree is on, and who wants to see it torn down.

A depressed Stanley shows up again, and Dorothy hands him off to Blanche for the evening. She soon fumes, however, when the two hit it off and start spending more time together. Meanwhile, Rose and Sophia sell sandwiches at the Boardwalk.

The girls have won tickets to see the premiere of Burt Reynolds' new movie, and meet the man himself at a party after. Their house is fumigated, however, leading them to stay in a hotel -- where they (and everyone else there) are soon arrested for prostitution.

Blanche is devastated when her doctor tells her she may be pregnant. On a follow-up visit, she learns this was a false reading, but what it actually turns out to be is, to her, even worse -- she's going through menopause. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Rose begin breeding minks for profit.