Christmas is a time to be with family, but not for Alf. He is destined to spend Christmas in hospital, having his hip replaced.

Alf falls asleep watching cricket and dreams he is batting for England.

Alf has a fight at a tea dance and meets up again with his adversary outside his house. and The Ken Jones Tea Dance Quintet.

Gwenneth and Min come to visit Alf. They decide to hold a seance to talk to long-departed friends.

When Alf is given a cordless telephone it turns out to be more of a hindrance than a help.

The arrival of Alfs AIDS leaflets spurs him and Arthur into action to aid Mary Whitehouse.

Alfs joy at Rita's pending divorce is short-lived when he learns she is to live with the new doctor.