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After Bart's blood saves Burns, Homer sends his boss a nasty letter for falling short of the material gratitude that Homer expected.
Bart earns less than he expected doing chores for a neighbor, so he goes partners with Milhouse and Martin on a rare comic book.
Homer and Marge attend a marriage retreat, where Homer catches a legendary fish---and maybe more.
Lisa finds that Homer pales in comparison with her substitute teacher, as does Bart with his opponent for class president.
Ringo Starr has a cartoon cameo as Marge gets to paint a portrait of Mr. Burns.
Grandpa Simpson loses his love, leaving him with a heavy heart---and a heavy wallet when his sweetie leaves him money in her will.
Bart's dog is sent to obedience school after he destroys Homer's expensive new sneaks.
Danny DeVito is the voice of Homer's wealthy long-lost half brother, who makes the mistake of giving Homer an important job.
Bart benefits when Principal Skinner falls for his Aunt Patty, who has Skinner but doesn't want him, while Aunt Selma has naught but want.
After learning eternal hell is the price for stealing, Lisa decides she'd rather go to heaven than watch pirated cable.
Marge and Homer reveal how they met as they tell a tale of love at first sight (but only for one) and the high-school prom they attended (but not together).
Homer takes to sushi like a fish to water, but an apprentice chef may have given Homer some bad blowfish---and 24 hours to live.
A lawyer suggests there may be profit in the pain after Bart suffers minor injuries in a collision with Burns' car.
Marge's protests over cartoon violence lead to a cultural renaissance in Springfield.
After seeing a daredevil at a truck rally, Bart discovers his reason for living---a career in death defiance.
On Thanksgiving, Bart runs away after accidentally wrecking Lisa's centerpiece.
Lisa gives Bart some tips on handling the pressure in a miniature-golf grudge match with a neighbor's son.
Homer's success as the mascot of Springfield's minor-league ball club earns him a shot at the majors, in Capital City.
Homer's boss, Burns, wants to be governor to lower nuclear-safety standards to keep his plant on line. Blackboard 'I will not Xerox my Butt'.
Halloween tales include a family in a haunted house; a misunderstanding with aliens; and a rendition of "The Raven."
Homer lies on a medical insurance form in order to obtain a miracle hair restoring drug. Blackboard: 'Tar is not a plaything.'
In exchange for study tips, Bart gives the class brain anti-geek lessons, but regrets it when the brain becomes too Bart-like. Blackboard: 'I will not encourage others to fly'.